with complete Dear Michaela blog
Last night I had a dream that I was dying. It was a procedure that took several days. Each day I had to take a different set of pills, and then I had to complete a task, and on the fourth day it would be complete, and I would leave this life. One day I... Continue Reading →
This morning, before I was really awake, at the trailing end of a dream, the thought came to me that I should finish writing my book, Missing Michaela. Now I did finish this manuscript once, 25 years ago. But I look back on the world and myself then, and, well, it's like looking back on... Continue Reading →
10:00 a.m. This morning I woke up, and I had to check in with myself. Today is the day I will receive the results of my PET scan. I have already received the biopsy results, so I know I have metastatic carcinoma, but the PET scan will tell me if I have a little bit... Continue Reading →
I sit reading, and while I read, my fingers run across my neck, then down across my collarbone. This is a subconscious habit of mine, it seems, and a fortunate one. A few days ago, though, as I was doing this it suddenly struck me, I am caressing my cancer! I was really kind of... Continue Reading →
I remember thinking, decades ago, that if I ever got cancer, I wouldn't want to know. At the time, I considered it a death sentence, and I did not think I had it in me to have to spend an extended amount of time knowing I was going to die. I imagined shaking in the... Continue Reading →
I actually consider myself to be a painfully left brained person. I write, I draw, I paint, but I do it very realistically. I have not been able to break free of drawing from a photo or real life, and most of the writing I have done in my life has been logical, persuasive writing.... Continue Reading →
Happy Mother's Day to everyone out there who has been brave enough to take on this most important, most joyful, most heartbreaking job in the world. We actually celebrated yesterday, because that was the day when all of us were able to be together. The photo above is actually of the flowers my grandson gave... Continue Reading →
Spring has sprung here in Iowa. They say it's nice to live in a place with four seasons, and here you can have all four of them in a couple of weeks. We actually had an early spring, and beautiful little flowers started growing in our yard. They were like hope. But then the snow... Continue Reading →
I have been trying to write a blog entry for awhile now, but it has been really hard. These are some crazy times we live in. Not just crazy, actually. They are downright unbelievable. I sometimes do something else, watch a TV series or whatever, and get caught up in it, and then I come back to... Continue Reading →
