Life has been really busy the last few months, and really, really stressful. So I haven’t got much work done on my book. But I have a three-day weekend coming up here, and I’m going to get down to it. I am just tossing everything and starting fresh. Honestly I think that would be faster and easier than sorting through my existing manuscript and various revisions. Oh yes, I love to revise. I could probably write the same chapter over and over again until the end of time. This time, however, I want to get going and I don’t want to even read it until I have finished, not even when I start to get that “what am I doing this is all garbage” feeling….
So this book, for those of you who haven’t been reading my blog for years, is fiction inspired by fact. I know a person who is always relating conversations she has had with various people. I am actually pretty sure those most of those conversations never happened, but it isn’t that she’s lying. She is just making them up as illustrations for the point she is making, if that makes sense. And that’s kind of what I’m doing with this book. Yes, it is about a mom with two daughters. Yes, the oldest daughter gets kidnapped. And yes, the younger daughter is largely based on my youngest. Yes, I will draw on my experiences, and fully draw on my feelings, and some of what I write will be based on actual events. But for the most part, it won’t be.
There are a couple of reasons for this. I have written fully factual accounts of Michaela’s kidnapping before, and I have decided I am just not comfortable with it. First of all, my real life, even as the mother of a missing child, is honestly not interesting enough to make a book. Second, I haven’t lived my life in a bubble. My life involves other people, and I am 100 percent not comfortable writing about other people’s private lives. I have a hard time even writing about my kids in this blog! And finally, related to the first reason, there is no resolution to Michaela’s story. Living without a resolution is, of course, a story in itself, but not enough of one, especially when I subtract from it every juicy morsel that happens to involve other people in my life.
I haven’t decided whether in my novel I will have a resolution to the kidnapping. I’m still mulling that one over. That would be extraordinarily difficult emotionally to write, and possibly inappropriate to contemplate out loud about some of the things that might have happened to Michaela? But there will be other stuff going on that thanks-be-to-God is completely fictional, which will provide at least some sort of a resolution. And maybe I’ll leave the other open-ended … for a sequel, once I get a real resolution to work from….
I will check in every now and then. In the meantime, please send waves of creative energy my way when you think of me.